"Look Over There!!" "Sshhhhhh, You'll Scare it!"

"look its over there!" "Now its in the corner!'' "Shhhhhhh you'll scare it," were only some of the whispers that were echoing around in the kiwi enclosure. The enclosure was dark so before we got to see the kiwis we had to do a little darkness exercise. We had to cover one eye like a pirate and say ''Arr.'' It wasn't long before someone spotted the KIWI.

Miss Lister's feedback:

• Great descriptive language: whispers, echoing
• Well done with the subject-specific vocabulary: enclosure
• Speech marks are perfect when there is dialgue

• Remember a new line when someone new is speaking
• Check for capital letters in your post and title
• Check its - do any of them need to be it's? (it is)

"Look it's over there!" 
"Now its in the corner!" 
"Shhhhhhh you'll scare it," were only some of the whispers that were echoing around in the kiwi enclosure. The enclosure was dark so before we got to see the kiwis we had to do a little darkness exercise. We had to cover one eye like a pirate and say 
"Arr." It wasn't long before someone spotted